Tuesday, November 06, 2007

For nobody but myself, please look away.

******The title is intended to discourage anyone who is easily upset, especially at work. I read this again before posting, and I blubbered once again. Blubbering seems to be something I am very good at right now.******

I have been breaking out in full blown breath gasping tears tonight, most of the night. It began with Suzanne's sobbing while we drove off with her P-love, and never stopped. I am just a mess. Not your fault Suzanne, in fact, I am so sorry. I love him, too.

This is Perry's last night, and for him it is not proving to be a good one.
He has been having mucus diarrhea all night, a couple of times at J&S's house and 3 times so far at home, and most recently vomiting which is what sent me into such a state of blubbering. Thankfully, all occured outside.

After the vomit episode, I forced a nausea pill into his mouth and got it down. I had decided earlier that I was not going to give him any more pills, but after the vomiting, I thought he may be better off with this one in him. I hope it makes the night easier for him.

My baby is so sick, he is going to heaven tomorrow and I can't stop crying.

I will probably not sleep at all. I am staying downstairs on the couch where I can be close to him.

My face is hot and red and blotchy, nose raw, and my eye sockets are twice the normal size, but I digress. This isn't about me.

Thanks for not reading this.

1 comment:

Rogue said...

well it's a safe bet that i'm going to be blubbering right along side you.
someone says kleenex and i bawl.

perry, you be good now. your mummy is so proud of you.
and skittles misses you.